hmm... jus pack my files w all my cert aft gettin my cert of graduation fr my dance gp at beginnin this mth... realized something. b it big or small, impt or unimpt, i actually got cert every yr fr yr 1994 till 2008 except for 2009 & 2010.
so 2009 & 2010 i didnt accomplish anything??? eerr... actually, on serious note, by right should ve graduated fr dance gp in 2010 but got delayed due to d xmas day performance so i should only say just left 2009?
so i didn't accomplish anything in 2009? not exactly again cos i had a breakthrough to b a emcee for d 1st time & it's in front of ~300+ ppl for a weddin banquet.
however, sad to say, not all things will ve d so call certificate to proof wat u had done. & seein d empty 2009 & 2010 cert did sadden me in a way cos d trend of cert collection yrly was broken. but nvm tt. so wat if thr r so many cert? hw many r useful when i seachin for my future job? guess d main r my 'o' lvl cert, my poly cert & my uni cert ba. & at most my testimonials.
if i apply for job beyond my field of study, mayb a few other cert might b useful but tt oso depend on wat type of job. but still some cert r useless... though i work hard. wat u may like b4 may not b of help nw.
like i like maths last time, represent sch go other sch for comp but jus get a cert of participation. so wat if i got a prize? so wat if i top sch for maths? w jus an expire maths, wat job can i find?
& i was in uniform gp, was in sjab & cant go for camp. parents did allow eventually but they kept scarin me till i got panick attack & dare not go. so, i was jus a small fry & yet hold many positions like logistic, secretary, public duty, first aid i/c, etc which my sch only recognize 1 which was 'climb' to d top which was secretary cos d rest were jus an assistant. so wat? w effort done, i jus got a b3 for my eca. anw, think of it, even if i got A, so wat again? wat i'll b doing next? will i need d knowledge of 1st aid? do i need to lead ppl? do i ve wat it takes to lead ppl? i not in nursin, i not a paramedic, so wat i'd again might not b of use...
& next. so wat when i got a grade 5 piano & music theory cert? can i teach & earn extra w tt? no. can i perform to earn? no. can i use it for job hunt? no. will i need for job in my field or sales or admin? no. it end up jus for recretion only.
so all in all, havin so many cert oso no use. it only show tt i'm a master of none. but at least will ve a decently professionalism which is bio sci ba. but still, if u ask me do, ok but if u ask me theory. i'm dead again.
& so, seeing my rojak cert made me feel more demoralize actually unlike when i was a fresh graduate from poly. so much optimistic to think tt this might help, tt might do. but nw. aft facin d harsh reality, know d impossibility unless miracle.
Monday, 31 January 2011
irritating, thick skinned, selfish ppl
i don understand... y thr r such irritatin & thick skinned ppl ard... i agreed w d prof who wanted anyone to jus clear d waste bag once full & though i m jus a fyp student, i still did it... anw, it's not d 1st time i did this kinda rubbish work le. i did for 4 yrs when i was still workin b4 i came back to study, clearin all d bags of rubbish which d students dump.
anw, thr is an autoclave rm at b1 unlike last time when i'd to autoclave to sterilize all d waste myself so jus nw, seein d bin was full, i changed a new bag.
actually, thr was a duty rooster in d lab. each wk, some1, graduate student/staff, would clear it esp to write d necessary info & bring downstair. & apparently, i was doin right beside d graduate student, ZH, & she treat s if nothing had happened. nvm tt. i oso duno she was d 1 but seein d bin full & can't throw anymore so i clear & ask d 1 i was under on wat to write. was told tt it was ZH's turn & since i alrdy clear, all i ve to do is to ask her to write & prob send down. Don need her to clear d bins le but den...
when ask ZH, she act blur like duno wat happen & y she need to write. & she still asked if it's her turn & she still ask if another graduate student had done yet. i alrdy help her to clear d bin & tie up leh. she alrdy is in advantage & yet still wanna push to this & tt... & she den act act n see see & say, 'oh u alrdy do ah? den u put thr loh'. didn't even bother to thk me. i did not jus 1 bag beside her. i did 2 bags right beside her leh. auntie, r u too much???
everything oso wan ppl let u use 1st. everything oso want d best. scare ppl take ur things. r u a prof? r u a president? r u a queen? u r jus a graduate students like 2 others in d lab lah. & u r not even graduating yet loh. wat's so big deal bout ur project? u gonna find some breakthru for d whole world? if not den shut up lah. ppl cannoy put things on ur desk but u can put urs on others? u r a selfish old hag lah... u r not so old but ur doing is makin u looks really old & ugly fr within.
anw, thr is an autoclave rm at b1 unlike last time when i'd to autoclave to sterilize all d waste myself so jus nw, seein d bin was full, i changed a new bag.
actually, thr was a duty rooster in d lab. each wk, some1, graduate student/staff, would clear it esp to write d necessary info & bring downstair. & apparently, i was doin right beside d graduate student, ZH, & she treat s if nothing had happened. nvm tt. i oso duno she was d 1 but seein d bin full & can't throw anymore so i clear & ask d 1 i was under on wat to write. was told tt it was ZH's turn & since i alrdy clear, all i ve to do is to ask her to write & prob send down. Don need her to clear d bins le but den...
when ask ZH, she act blur like duno wat happen & y she need to write. & she still asked if it's her turn & she still ask if another graduate student had done yet. i alrdy help her to clear d bin & tie up leh. she alrdy is in advantage & yet still wanna push to this & tt... & she den act act n see see & say, 'oh u alrdy do ah? den u put thr loh'. didn't even bother to thk me. i did not jus 1 bag beside her. i did 2 bags right beside her leh. auntie, r u too much???
everything oso wan ppl let u use 1st. everything oso want d best. scare ppl take ur things. r u a prof? r u a president? r u a queen? u r jus a graduate students like 2 others in d lab lah. & u r not even graduating yet loh. wat's so big deal bout ur project? u gonna find some breakthru for d whole world? if not den shut up lah. ppl cannoy put things on ur desk but u can put urs on others? u r a selfish old hag lah... u r not so old but ur doing is makin u looks really old & ugly fr within.
Sunday, 30 January 2011
a lost dragonfly
1 aft another...
b4 my tummy got any much better... saw something fly into my rm. tot was d small beetle so ignore but d sound really irritate me cos it's late at nite & i don like d fear tt it'll fly to me in d middle of d nite so turn to look ard for tt 'beetle', wantin to grab a plastic bag to catch it & dump it outside.
in d end, wat i saw was not d usual beetle i always encounter. it's a dragonfly!!! OMG!!! a big dragonfly jus flew into my rm. hw to catch it? it'll bound it fly ard if i try to catch it w a ntuc plastic bag & d probability of touchin me is super high s compared to catchin d small beetle w tt size of plastic bag. gosh...
plan A:
off d bedrm light
on d livin rm light, since it's not a pest, wont breed like tt, let my parents settle it d next mornin when they went into d livin rm ba.
& i left my window open so it can fly out too.
den i realized my laptop screen still on & i quickly off it.
so did it work? i tot it did cos i no hear anymore of d irritating flyin sound & so i tot i can slp in peace until a while ltr when i heard d irritatin flatterin of d wings again ard my wall mount fan. use torch to look carefully n saw it was caught behind d fan. cos it's not a pest, i didn't wanna harm it & yet i was worried it was alrdy injured. & so,
plan B:
off bedrm light
on livin rm light
window alrdy close. didn't wanna waste time open since probability of flyin to livin rm higher cos of d light
pulled my mattress away fr d wall cos if it was injured, it would fall. didn't wan it to land on my mattress or pillow or i'll ve to figure out hw to get rid of it & hw i slp ltr on?
den off my fan
outcome?
s i off my fan, saw my laptop screen still on. so, i quickly wanna off it but... it flew to my hand s i was tryin to off d screen. i got a 'heart attack' & almost scream out loud if it's not too late. s i jumped backwards, it fly & stop on my laptop. OMG!!! hw to off d screen? if don off, den will it stay thr whole night? den isn't it d same s slpin w it in my rm w d chances of kissin it in d middle of d nite.
so hw? parents said gd nite le, dear went back le. wat to do? lucky for me, saw parents rm light still on. so mum haven slp. ask her for help le cos no choice. mum caught it & let it out of my window but it flew back in & fly ard. aft much accomodation, mum re-caught it & let it off at d main door & off it went. *phew*
b4 my tummy got any much better... saw something fly into my rm. tot was d small beetle so ignore but d sound really irritate me cos it's late at nite & i don like d fear tt it'll fly to me in d middle of d nite so turn to look ard for tt 'beetle', wantin to grab a plastic bag to catch it & dump it outside.
in d end, wat i saw was not d usual beetle i always encounter. it's a dragonfly!!! OMG!!! a big dragonfly jus flew into my rm. hw to catch it? it'll bound it fly ard if i try to catch it w a ntuc plastic bag & d probability of touchin me is super high s compared to catchin d small beetle w tt size of plastic bag. gosh...
plan A:
off d bedrm light
on d livin rm light, since it's not a pest, wont breed like tt, let my parents settle it d next mornin when they went into d livin rm ba.
& i left my window open so it can fly out too.
den i realized my laptop screen still on & i quickly off it.
so did it work? i tot it did cos i no hear anymore of d irritating flyin sound & so i tot i can slp in peace until a while ltr when i heard d irritatin flatterin of d wings again ard my wall mount fan. use torch to look carefully n saw it was caught behind d fan. cos it's not a pest, i didn't wanna harm it & yet i was worried it was alrdy injured. & so,
plan B:
off bedrm light
on livin rm light
window alrdy close. didn't wanna waste time open since probability of flyin to livin rm higher cos of d light
pulled my mattress away fr d wall cos if it was injured, it would fall. didn't wan it to land on my mattress or pillow or i'll ve to figure out hw to get rid of it & hw i slp ltr on?
den off my fan
outcome?
s i off my fan, saw my laptop screen still on. so, i quickly wanna off it but... it flew to my hand s i was tryin to off d screen. i got a 'heart attack' & almost scream out loud if it's not too late. s i jumped backwards, it fly & stop on my laptop. OMG!!! hw to off d screen? if don off, den will it stay thr whole night? den isn't it d same s slpin w it in my rm w d chances of kissin it in d middle of d nite.
so hw? parents said gd nite le, dear went back le. wat to do? lucky for me, saw parents rm light still on. so mum haven slp. ask her for help le cos no choice. mum caught it & let it out of my window but it flew back in & fly ard. aft much accomodation, mum re-caught it & let it off at d main door & off it went. *phew*
overbloatedness
tummy weird since aft steamboat... believed it's cos by too full...
i understand tt parents wanted more ingredients & thus, much more food & try to clear s much s possible but tot they oso understood tt if full, tt's? esp aft let them noe tt dear went for endoscopy??? & since previous steamboat they nvr force us???
jus nw, dad took d pig kidney & left 3 & ask us to clear. & last time, he asked if we wan d prawn den put in but jus nw, he jus dump in & say each pax is 3 prawns. & he oso bought 1 flower crab for each pax & dump in at d end.
was full almost to d v max but tot 3 prawn & 1 small flower crab wont harm much but looks like i'm wrong. v bloated, v xin ku & dear ask me took d MMT. didn't quite felt better & in d end felt like vomittin. dashed to d bathrm but cant vomit anything out but tears were forced out... took anti vomitin med aft tt. nw tummy still weird weird la... :(
when can my parents learn their lesson? do i really ve to look unwell in front of them? to show them hw back it felt rather than tryin to look ok? do i ve to vomit in front of them then they can b happy? hw many times do i ve to say i don wanna eat too full? & esp for dear?
he's other ppl's son. does they wanna make him unwell den happy oso? last time when went for dinner w his nanny's family & he ended up vomitin at nite alrdy made me felt so guilty. if it's due to my parents, i'll feel even worse. can they put themselves in my shoes?
anw, jus hope d terrible feelin will go away. last time i rmbr feelin d overbloatedness in serious case was oso steamboat but was w my friends at turf city. & it lasted till d next day. hope this time wont ba.
i understand tt parents wanted more ingredients & thus, much more food & try to clear s much s possible but tot they oso understood tt if full, tt's? esp aft let them noe tt dear went for endoscopy??? & since previous steamboat they nvr force us???
jus nw, dad took d pig kidney & left 3 & ask us to clear. & last time, he asked if we wan d prawn den put in but jus nw, he jus dump in & say each pax is 3 prawns. & he oso bought 1 flower crab for each pax & dump in at d end.
was full almost to d v max but tot 3 prawn & 1 small flower crab wont harm much but looks like i'm wrong. v bloated, v xin ku & dear ask me took d MMT. didn't quite felt better & in d end felt like vomittin. dashed to d bathrm but cant vomit anything out but tears were forced out... took anti vomitin med aft tt. nw tummy still weird weird la... :(
when can my parents learn their lesson? do i really ve to look unwell in front of them? to show them hw back it felt rather than tryin to look ok? do i ve to vomit in front of them then they can b happy? hw many times do i ve to say i don wanna eat too full? & esp for dear?
he's other ppl's son. does they wanna make him unwell den happy oso? last time when went for dinner w his nanny's family & he ended up vomitin at nite alrdy made me felt so guilty. if it's due to my parents, i'll feel even worse. can they put themselves in my shoes?
anw, jus hope d terrible feelin will go away. last time i rmbr feelin d overbloatedness in serious case was oso steamboat but was w my friends at turf city. & it lasted till d next day. hope this time wont ba.
Thursday, 27 January 2011
change of role...
changed of role...
had been a lab tech prep & guidin undergrads for their yr 1 & 2 prac class n apparently, a staff in my prof's lab was 1 of d students den n recently, she had advice me to go for endnote course which is supposed to help me in d referencin for my fyp report & taught me on some of d function of MS word...
jus nw, she taught me on other functions again & i even learn bout d 2 diff color settin of photos. she oso taught me on other things. 风水轮流转... lol... & she is leavin le. haiz... too bad...
anw, by right our fate should ve ended in 07 when she entered into yr 3 cos i only take 1st 2 yrs of prac. but cos i further my studies n had chosen to do attachment n fyp in this lab, i got d chance to know her s a friend. life is jus unpredictable...
had been a lab tech prep & guidin undergrads for their yr 1 & 2 prac class n apparently, a staff in my prof's lab was 1 of d students den n recently, she had advice me to go for endnote course which is supposed to help me in d referencin for my fyp report & taught me on some of d function of MS word...
jus nw, she taught me on other functions again & i even learn bout d 2 diff color settin of photos. she oso taught me on other things. 风水轮流转... lol... & she is leavin le. haiz... too bad...
anw, by right our fate should ve ended in 07 when she entered into yr 3 cos i only take 1st 2 yrs of prac. but cos i further my studies n had chosen to do attachment n fyp in this lab, i got d chance to know her s a friend. life is jus unpredictable...
Monday, 24 January 2011
BORED!!!
bored... I'm super bored... dear workin 24 hr, my friend everday lesson, planna go jog aft work yet sky dark dark n started rainin when i reachin my stop... n hm don ve photoshop for me to play w... s d pic & so tempted to edit. i should ve jus stay at d lab instead... once hm means hm, JAILED... jus not a gd day today, not a gd start of d week... :(
tired yet too early sleep, n too tired to enjoy playin piano so no pt... only thing i wish can do is jus photoshop la cos i don believed i cant get d softcopy out fr d hardcopy. wanna 气死 picture ME & to feel more 爽 but no chance to. no other mood for other things. I'M SO SO BORED!!! 闷死人啦!!!
tired yet too early sleep, n too tired to enjoy playin piano so no pt... only thing i wish can do is jus photoshop la cos i don believed i cant get d softcopy out fr d hardcopy. wanna 气死 picture ME & to feel more 爽 but no chance to. no other mood for other things. I'M SO SO BORED!!! 闷死人啦!!!
Saturday, 22 January 2011
heart attack
ytd took time off to go for workshop on endnote which a friend in d lab recommended when i was doin attachment mths ago. it supposed to end at 2 pm so i tot got lunch break n i forward d mail to d prof to say i need time off during d time for course. end up, no lunch break. jus a slight longer break w old chang kee curry puff at ard 10.30 am. so i end up gg straight to lab cos prof been really unhappy bout punctuality lately. n was busy immediately. luckily got incubation time so went downstair to find something to eat but d hotdog bun was like cannot make it. it's not only cold. d bread's hard & dry too. no wonder whenever i go thr find something eat, i end up walking off. haiz...
well, beside tt, i got a heart attack during my 2nd break (toilet break) of d course. received a SMS fr dear saying tt his tyre came off when he alrdy said he's gg off awhile ago aft his car was serviced at paya lebar. d duration oso meant tt he should be somewhr else le so it's even more scary. but to receive his SMS, it oso tells me tt he's still 'ok'. but hw 'ok'? tt i not sure. so i quickly call him.
thru d phone, he assured me tt he's alrite. he was still ard d workshop area. his speed was slow. initially hear softer sound so he slow down bit. den sound grew louder n he go even slower till when d sound got super loud tt he stop immediately & walk ard check n found a miss wheel. he oso nvr go find d wheel but walked straight to d workshop to get d ppl to come n check.
when i got to see him, found out it's d back wheel at d left side tt came off n d car was slanted n d wheel was found like ~10 m away. can't imagine if he's gg at higher speed or worse, at expressway at peak hr. dangerous to himself n oso to others cos of d loose wheel.
ask if d workshop compensate anything or refund d $$ for servicin, n there is none. jus say if car got prob n is related to this, they will service for free. who wanna go back thr la... i forbid dear to go back. i rather spend more if other place is more exp n to make sure tt d car is really safe to drive n tt d driver n all passengers will b safe n sound. n oso not pose danger to other drivers on d road than to get this kinda of slip short service. should check properly den give back d keys lor.
anw, i don think dear will go complain tt company cos he go thr cos it's an old friend of his mom. but no matter wat d relation is, should check properly ma. i don care d relationship. i jus wan dear to b safe so i wont allow him to go back thr again. 1 careless mistake can take away ppl's life leh... life is not something to play w...
well, beside tt, i got a heart attack during my 2nd break (toilet break) of d course. received a SMS fr dear saying tt his tyre came off when he alrdy said he's gg off awhile ago aft his car was serviced at paya lebar. d duration oso meant tt he should be somewhr else le so it's even more scary. but to receive his SMS, it oso tells me tt he's still 'ok'. but hw 'ok'? tt i not sure. so i quickly call him.
thru d phone, he assured me tt he's alrite. he was still ard d workshop area. his speed was slow. initially hear softer sound so he slow down bit. den sound grew louder n he go even slower till when d sound got super loud tt he stop immediately & walk ard check n found a miss wheel. he oso nvr go find d wheel but walked straight to d workshop to get d ppl to come n check.
when i got to see him, found out it's d back wheel at d left side tt came off n d car was slanted n d wheel was found like ~10 m away. can't imagine if he's gg at higher speed or worse, at expressway at peak hr. dangerous to himself n oso to others cos of d loose wheel.
ask if d workshop compensate anything or refund d $$ for servicin, n there is none. jus say if car got prob n is related to this, they will service for free. who wanna go back thr la... i forbid dear to go back. i rather spend more if other place is more exp n to make sure tt d car is really safe to drive n tt d driver n all passengers will b safe n sound. n oso not pose danger to other drivers on d road than to get this kinda of slip short service. should check properly den give back d keys lor.
anw, i don think dear will go complain tt company cos he go thr cos it's an old friend of his mom. but no matter wat d relation is, should check properly ma. i don care d relationship. i jus wan dear to b safe so i wont allow him to go back thr again. 1 careless mistake can take away ppl's life leh... life is not something to play w...
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