quittin

argh... f***

sorry... gonna grumble again... jus ignore dis post la... i jus wanna let it out... cannot take it...

i think i wanna call it a quit for my dance & asked for relieved of duty for my soka mtg le... cant tahan la...

for dance, recent mths we had hire a trainer. & so, trg initially start to end later at almost 2 but too many of us & instructor need more time so ended up tt her time start fr 9 to 2 while we started at 8.30 & end at 2.30 by right

but... usually debrief super long w all d announcement, etc. so... we end almost 3 w/o lunch break. jus a take 10. though usually will become slightly longer than 10 min but it's unofficial so none of us go eat. anw, aft eat oso not gd to train & exercise. but... oso crazy loh. breakfast at 7 like tt den intensive trg den lunch aft 3.

we not super human la. robot oso need rest & recharge. seen friends go eat sweets take a small pcs of biscuit, some giddy giddy sit thr. yet no one say anything. can don so hardcore? cannot jus say la. -.-"

anw, trg end late is a major issue le. den usually only if got performance den we got extra trg. guess wat. recently, thr was once which they tot of gg to west coast park s an outin cum scoutin d place s there was an event to b held thr a week ltr. so chief asked all of us. give us option. say either trg or go thr. if trg, b usual. end at '2.30'. but if outin, end at 12.30. all of us choose outin. guess wat. in d end, got extra trg on a sat. if like tt, may s well we choose trg den no need d extra time & day.

den nw, say d instructor not free in nov. so... jus received a sms say got extra trg on 3 other sats in additional to our usual sun trg. & tt extra trg oso b like almost another 7hr loh.

thus, seein tt sms made me made up my mind. i wanna quit. i cant cont'd like tt. i cant give up my studies. this is my last chance. i had got 5 modules & i need to get think at least Bs and As. even if all B+ oso gain me a 3rd class. i got many assignments this sem. & assignment weight much more than b4. so this can oso b my final chance to use assignment to pull up my grades. if i don, tt's it. game over for me. if like tt, i may s well don futher my stuudies. mayb i would be better in terms of career aspect & even dance i oso can enjoy & cont watever they wan.

thus, tt made me oso wanna be relieved of my duties for my soka. they had really been gettin in my nerve. keep callin me, buggin me. etc etc. d more they like tt, d more i repel oso & oso cos of my studies lah. i reall really wanna give up on all these la.

i'd alrdy given up on clinic work & try hard to use min. drink plain water even for lunch. eat sandwich, etc if i alone or if hm got whiite bread, i eat tt. i alrdy sacrifice. & don buy textbook & go to extend on sellin textbook & apply bursary. wat else they wan? they don no i quit job so at least i got the time to rest,e tc but i m thinkin tt mayb i shld jus tell

say i alrdy given up. admit i lied all these while. den say it's still a struggle for me. my grades were like jus pass & even fail a module. i need much more time & not gettin lesser time. i wanna quit fr my dance & get out of my duties and not more.

can they jus let me quit? i'm thinkin of tellin them i wanna quit but mayb not d part tt i'd quit my job long aho. if they don accept, i'll go mia le ba. since my phone plan b over at d end of d yr. i can terminate tt & sign a new line. make them cant get in touch w me. if they don believed i'd been strugglin in studies, i can print my transcript for them see. see hw 'well' i'd been doing.

I WANNA QUIT... I NEED TO QUIT... I HAD TO QUIT...